Teen Sex

Pass curser over scriptures & scroll to read.

Teen Sex

PETTING

A discussion of going steady often leads to the topic of petting . In order to effectively discuss this subject, it will help to stop and define terms

Quoting from Ann Landers again, "Necking is an exchange of hugs and kisses, keeping all hands on deck and all feet on the floor. Petting is, in general, necking out of control ."

Others claim that "necking" involves only from the neck up. For our purposes, let's consider petting to be a little more than a goodnight kiss or hug but not so much as going to bed with a date, which will be discussed in a later chapter.

A MEANS TO AN END

What about 'petting" for a Christian? Obviously it is enjoyable. God Himself made physical desire and pleasures a part of us (Genesis 1:28 & Hebrews 13:4) .

Petting is exciting, and it makes us feel desirable But it also arouses strong feelings which are not to be satisfied outside of marriage (I Corinthians 6:9-10

Petting is nature's way of preparing a couple to enjoy unlimited and fulfilling passion . Any time one crosses nature, in this case by petting but stopping before the natural conclusion, he will suffer.

The tensions of aroused but unfulfilled sexual desires are not easily dealt with. The habit of heavy petting and "stopping in time" can even cause sexual problems later in marriage

An even more serious problem is that, despite best intentions, petting is a road meant to go somewhere, and sometimes people get started down that road and can't stop. Right or wrong, emotions usually win out over intellect .

In other words, if you feel strongly about something at the moment, it becomes easy to rationalize away everything you've ever been taught about it . The millions of illegitimate children in the world are forceful testimony against the "I'll- stop-in-time" philosophy.

"But what's wrong with petting as long as I make sure that things never get completely out of control?" someone might ask. Assuming that such is possible, that a person could be so totally intellectually geared that his emotions never interered there i still another factor which makes petting wrong .

Matthew 5:27-29 teaches that if we get to the point where we wish we could go all the way with our date, we are guilty of adultery, even if we don't allow it to happen physically. In this situation, a person is not only responsible for himself but also for his date. If your petting leads your date to sin by his thoughts, you will be held guilty also (Matthew 18:6-8) .

IS THIS LOVE?

Petting also makes it very difficult to objectively evaluate your date as a possible marriage partner It blinds those involved to possibly grave incompatibilities in other areas.

Passion's most insidious trait is its ability to mask as love. Many homes have been begun on the basis of strong physical attraction and have then come to a bitter end when everyday living revealed the shallowness of such a foundation .

Another of the bad effects of petting is that it causes guilt. Christians know that sex is special and reserved for marriage (I Corinthians 7:1-2). With this knowledge, one can't pet heavily and feel good about it afterwards (James 4:17) .

Guilt requires a heavy toll physically and emotionally (Psalms 31:10). It cuts into a person's self-respect, nags at his conscience, and stifles spirituality .

PETTING AND POPULARITY

But can a girl, who won't pet, hope to be popular? A questionnaire given to students at the University of California, Michigan State and Cornell revealed almost unanimously that it is not essential for a girl to pet to be popular.

Of course, there are some boys with whom a girl would have to pet to be popular. But a boy who would leave you for this reason wouldn't have stayed long if you had given in. This type of boy is personally insecure and needs the reassurance of continual new conquests. If a date is only interested in your body, the sooner you find out, the better .

WHO SHOULD HOLD THE LINE?

Remember, popularity based on a reputation for petting is never satisfying, as you can never be sure you're really liked for yourself. Girls traditionally set the limits on how far to go; but since boys are aroused quicker and more easily, they should bear equal or greater responsibility in this area . As Pat Boone warns, "Kissing for fun is like playing with a beautiful candle in a room full of dynamite".

[Image]

The above information was taken from Sandra Humphrey's book,
"Don't Kiss Toads".
Published by Christian Communications
A division of the Gospel Advocate Co.
PO Box 150, Nashville, Tn 37202
http://www.gospeladvocate.com
^click to visit^

Back to List